My first call was from Violet. A teacher's wife. We became friends a long time ago.
She called to see how I was, and to get my e-mail address since they had already shut down my ross account.
She said that everyone was upset about it, and that she and her husband hope that this means that I now get to move on to something better. I told her that I hope so too.
Like 5 mins later I got a call from M. She seemed to have been having a hard time making phone calls from school so she used her cell or the pay phone outside. I don't even know if she has a cell phone, but she couldn't talk long.
Like everyone else she wanted to know how I was holding up. She also said that she told Ms. Cumberbatch good bye for me and that she will be by to see me. M herself will be by on Friday to talk.
Later in the afternoon a teacher called me. He asked if I needed a letter of recommendation, and that he would be happy to give one, and that he was very sorry to see me go. I told him thank you and that I would like that letter.
Then back around sunset, which is like 7pm I think I got a call from Gary. The first guy that came by to see about things on Tuesday.
He wanted to know if I said I was sorry and begged to get my job back. I'm not begging. Nor am I really sorry. I'm sorry it turned out this way. I'm sorry to have my friends be worry about me. But I did something that I thought I could do. I am not in the habit of doing wrong things, know I'm doing wrong things, sneak around doing it, then kiss feet when I'm caught.
I went through school thinking that if you were going to cheat at a something what was the point of doing it in the first place? When I did my job at Ross, I did my job. I asked what could or couldn't be done about something if I didn't know. And if I ever lead someone wrong it was because I was miss informed or not informed to a change in the first place.
I told him that I didn't beg, and that I'm not really sorry, because at the time I believed that I wasn't doing anything wrong, and to a point I still think so.
I had an odd day dream today when I was napping from my headaches. I dreamed that they called me in, and we were in the dean's office, and they asked me to come back with a few conditions. Like being on probation for a time, and maybe taking a small paycut for a few months. I knew that it wasn't Ron's idea to get me back, and I said that I would have to think about it.
Could I go back if they asked? I'm sure that if I did the details would have gotten out about why I was fired in the first place, or at least the worst part of it, and then there would be Ron. Could we ever really work together again? I didn't give an answer in my dream, but after the talk with Gary over the phone I came up with no. I don't think I could once it wasn't Ron's idea to get me back.
That was a small closer for me, but it didn't keep me from feeling sick again. I almost cried after Violet hung up earlier in the day.
At least my sister is happy.
I sent her to town to cash my check. It was a little over 3 grand. She paid off water, and most of lights, and all of Courts. She picked up a new handle for the shower, a new bottle of liquid hand soap, lunch (on the cheep side) and something else I'm sure. She came back with over 2 grand.
I would have gone to cash the check myself, but I seem to have developed a medical condition that keeps me from walking. Really. So she went off and did that for me. But I will have to call Hosford myself and let them know that I don't have a job so that if I can't make my next payment, they won't be to quick to come over and reposes anything. BTY, I have about 4 grand left to pay them.
That is one of the things that scares me the most. As far as they are concerned I'm still paying off for a washer, a living room set and now a matters. Maybe I can get them to have it be that I've already paid off the washer and the matters, and that I'm just left paying off what is left on the living room set. It's worth a shot since I've paid off so much already. That would have to be done in person I'm sure. So that will have to wait until my leg is better. At least I don't have to worry about not being able to pay the next payment at the end of the month since I have so much.
Well it's now 2:11am and I feel a bit too sick to go to sleep, but since my tv is busted I can't lay in bed and watch tv until I fall asleep with it being on a time for it turns itself off in like an hour.
Did I ever say that I'm still afraid of the dark? Yep, 29 and I'm still afraid of the dark and with everything else going around in my head, sleeping at night isn't all that easy.
Well, I guess that's most of it.
See ya.
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http://jhoye.blogspot.com
- There I share my life.
- There I have links to what use to be my life.
- There you can find out what I might want out of life.
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